I haven’t officially reviewed Battlefield Bad Company 2, though I’ll make my opinion quite clear: it is superior to Modern Warfare 2 in every respect. I’ll be presenting my case in a future article, one that will surely irritate MW2 fans clinging to brand loyalty. In the meantime, I have some issues with Battlefield Bad Company 2 that are driving me nuts and chances are you…yes you, are responsible.

World Wide Suck

Unlike most video games that are either great or not based upon its own merits, Battlefield Bad Company 2 is a truly great game, made less so by an abundance of players who don’t know their ass from their elbow. I’ve made an attempt to alleviate some of the rampant suck by writing a helpful multiplayer guide, which you can find here. Part II will be coming soon.

Unfortunately, most people who suck don’t know they suck and hence, their suckiness continues to evolve within an impenetrable bubble of suck. That would be fine if they were playing on their own private server, but they aren’t; they’re cooped up with me and I’m trying to win a round.

Let’s take a closer gander at how players suck:

What’s The Objective?

Bad Company 2 multiplayer has a pretty simple objective, depending upon the game type: either blow up or defend two crates within a zone in Rush, or capture and hold at least 2 out of 3 control points in Conquest. While this seems pretty freaking straight-forward, apparently these concepts are very difficult to understand for an alarming number of players.

If you are not actively engaged in either defending or assaulting crates or control zones, you are wasting everyone’s time who has an interest in playing the game as it is designed. I’m talking to you, the six snipers on the assaulting team, hiding up in the mountains for the entire duration of the round, taking pot shots at defenders who aren’t even busy defending. No team needs 6 snipers. That’s 6 people who will never assault the crate. Add to this a few people in tanks and a few more in a helicopter, and you’re left with only a few poor bastards (usually me) trying to penetrate enemy lines with zero support.

Let me make this real simple: When you are on the attacking team, you cannot win by killing more of the defensive team than they kill of you. It’s not possible. It’s doesn’t matter how many times you try or wish things were differently, it just won’t work. This isn’t Modern Warfare 2.

Typical Scene: I’m on defense. An enemy has penetrated the lines and managed to activate a crate. In a perfect world, several defenders would be converging on that area with guns blazing, removing hostiles and deactivating the bomb. This isn’t what I generally see.

Instead, I see people standing around, making no effort whatsoever. Or, if they make an effort, it is so half-assed as to be useless, like the dainty noobs who appear too frightened to enter a building because they might get killed so they hang around outside like a gaggle of drifters, waiting for god knows what until finally the bomb explodes, objective lost. Good work men. Try not to work up a sweat next time.

Where The F*&K Did You Get Your Pilot’s License, Phoenix University?

My balls shrivel every time I hop into a helicopter as a gunner or passenger, my life at the mercy of some pilot I don’t know. It’s like Chat-Roulette, you never know what is going to happen or what you’re going to see, but chances are it won’t be pretty.

Some people just aren’t born to fly. I’ll place some of the blame of this on DICE, who made no attempt to create a flight tutorial or practice area, two elements that would have gone a long way in reducing frustration. Because of this omission, players are left learning to fly in a live multiplayer environment and that means the rest of us get to be Guinea Pigs for your flight-training.

If you can’t fly, please don’t hog such a valuable asset. Learn by watching. Read the manual for controls. Adjust the controls from the options menu to better suit your style. Hell, just know the controls.

The absolute worst thing that can happen is a rookie pilot uses the helicopter as an expensive transport vehicle, landing the machine behind enemy lines, hopping out and doing whatever that noob is going to do. In the meantime, a crafty enemy simply jumps into the copter and takes it for himself. If he knows what he’s doing, that helicopter will now become a serious threat to the other team. Worse, the original team won’t gain access to another helicopter until the original is destroyed. This rule hold true for all vehicles, not just helicopters.

Every vehicle you abandon can, and will be, used against you. Either repair the vehicle or blow it up so it respawns. Don’t just let it sit around!

A word of advice on flying: don’t over-compensate. Little movements on the stick is all you need. Learn to hover first, controlling your speed by pitching the nose forward and back. Fly slow at first until you gain some insight.

More on Page 2

Remember Pixeljunk Racers, one of the first downloadable games on Sony’s Playstation Network? Yeah, the game that looked cool in screenshots but played like utter garbage? Yeah, the game that just about every critic hated? Thanks to the ESRB once again rating and outing an unannounced game, we’ve learned that PixelJunk Racers 2nd Lap will be filling that gaping hole in your soul. No word on when the sequel will be released to an unenthusiastic public.

SEGA has inadvertently let the proverbial cat-out-of-the-bag about Sonic the Hedgehog’s future game appearances, evidenced by the graphic above that was located on the official Sonic 4 website. The image reveals two important elements, including a release date (July 2010) and available platforms, which include the PlayStation Network, Xbox Live Arcade and the long-rumored and now confirmed, iPhone (and iPad).

Proof can be found here, though the image has apparently been removed by undoubtedly embarrassed representatives of SEGA.

Ben Jones, designer at Zipper Interactive currently working on MAG, must not be receiving enough hate mail in his Inbox.  This situation will be changing rapidly, as Mr. Jones claims that compared to Playstation Network players, Xbox Live players are immature.

“I actually consider Xbox Live the more immature of the two,” Jones said. “As we saw in the beta we’ve got an audience that’s willing to communicate and willing to organize and structure, and help other people how to play the game. That’s the most remarkable thing that I saw in the beta – random people helping other players along two try and familiarize themselves with this really cool experience.”

There are a lot of problems with Ben Jones’ statement. Let’s take a look:

First of all, MAG isn’t coming to the Xbox 360 so he has no idea if players would organize and help others. If he is basing his judgment off a few rounds of Modern Warfare 2, perhaps he has a point, but having played Modern Warfare 2 on both consoles, I can say there is no difference in maturity.

Secondly, a small percentage of players on the PS3 actually have headsets because the PS3 does not ship with one. As such, far fewer players communicate on the PS3 than the Xbox 360.

As an owner of both consoles, I have seen little difference in the maturity levels of players. Plenty of idiots to go around for everyone.

Ben Jones should be more concerned about his game, as having spent the past week with the beta has left me bored and bemused about its imminent failure. MAG has no future and no selling point beyond its 256 player count. Everything else is lackluster, derivative and clunky…like every other game Zipper has made.

Source

Remember when the Playstation 3 launched and Sony execs tripped all over themselves to say things like consumers were confused over all the SKUs of Xbox 360s, only to introduce a fleet of new PS3 SKUs? Remember when Sony execs criticized Microsoft for having two different models for Xbox Live in Silver and Gold? Funny how things change.

Kaz Hirai of Sony has officially confirmed that 2010 will bring a paid subscription to the Playstation 3.

Gamespot:

During the presentation, which emphasized Sony’s plans to make its game business profitable in the next fiscal year, Sony Computer Entertainment CEO Kaz Hirai confirmed the plans. “We will be building upon our current free [PSN] service offering with premium content and services to start the subscription model,” he told attendees.

Perhaps to assuage PS3 owners’ fears that they would soon have to pay to play online, Hirai issued a subsequent statement indicating the present level of service would remain gratis.

“SCE will further increase sales by offering users new entertainment through the combination of hardware, software, peripheral, and PlayStation Network,” Hirai said in a statement given to British outlets, such as CVG. “Especially in the online area, we are studying the possibility of introducing a subscription model, offering premium content and services, in addition to the current free services.” (Emphasis added.)

As of press time, US Sony reps had not offered Hirai’s statement or further clarification about its subscription plans for the PlayStation Network. Luckily, though, the “current free services” currently offered on PSN include online play, Facebook integration, and Netflix video streaming. On Xbox Live, both of those features are only accessible at the Gold membership level, which costs at least $50 per year.

I expect greed from video game companies; it’s the nature of the beast. It begins with the average $59.99 price-tag, which is too high for a completely original game, let alone one that re-purposes much of its content from prior versions, like NHL 10 or the latest Madden.  Then the greed morphs into DLC schemes like cheat codes that strong-arm players into purchases just so they can compete with other players in a multiplayer setting.

But with NHL 10, EA Sports has outdone themselves by offering up 246 individual DLC items, most of which influence specific parameters of your created player or offer additional helmets, sticks, skates and gloves that can be further enhanced by shelling out cash for attribute boosts.

This is so beyond the pale that my face didn’t know how to react; does it drop my jaw it total shock or scrunch up my face in complete disgust? It may have done both at once.

Now before the apologists start harping on me, I will point out that every item in the game can be unlocked through actual gameplay objectives, but most are rather difficult to obtain and all require a time commitment that could find you spending months just trying to acquire a specific helmet.

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